Sleep, where are you?

I haven't been sleeping. Well, I have, but not the good, ooo weee, that feels so good sleep.

Seroquel stopped working at 100mg. I was switched to some new thing called Fanapt, but it's too new. I don't trust anything when a pdoc can give samples. To me, that means a pharmaceutical sales rep is pushing something new that hasn't been sufficiently tested. So, I'm not taking it.

I tried klonopin on Thursday night, and I passed out at work on Friday. If my cellphone didn't ring, I would probably still be sleeping at work. I hate that drugged feeling, so I didn't take it Friday night or Saturday night. Not sure what I'm going to do tonight.

I wanted to do the seroquel because of my involuntary frowning and incessant jaw clenching. I was waking up with a headache because if how I locked my jaws. I needed something different.

I'm looking at melatonin. It's an otc product. I'll keep you posted.

I need to sleep!

I'm Back

It's been... almost 6 years without a post, and now I'm back.

Ashamed? Yes.
Angry? Yes.
Disappointed? Yes.

How did I return to 2006?

I'm on Lexapro and seroquel again, with lamotrigene thrown into the cocktail.

Panic attacks started this new chapter. They started in April, and got progressively worse until I knew that I had no choice. It was medicine or I'd lose my job.

Ironically, in the course of trying to be normal and keep my job, I lost my relationship(s)...two of them.

That's all for now.
I'll reconnect with you all soon.

In the interim, I'm back and pissed.