Major WTF!

It's OPEN SEASON on MARRIED MEN!!!

Fuck Em!

Who said it?
Yes I said!

I get a call at 5:45am from a business associate. I let it go to voicemail because my office hours are between 11am and 6pm. He's no exception.

I check the message at 7am. It said:

"This is Darian's wife, I want to know why your number is in my husband's phone. We've been married for five years. If you're woman enough to call me back, you will."

Yup, NICE JUST F*CKIN EXPIRED!

For this year, I've had 9 wives call me with this "who-are-you-to-my-husband" bullshit. I've protected their husbands by being cordial and respectful to their childish bitchy ass wives, and diffused the situation so it didn't escalate.

But, no more.

I call her back and say:

You want to know what my relationship is with your husband? Ask him. If not, its none of your fuckin business. Stupid, childish, CIA shit like this is why my number is in his phone; because his wife does ignorant ass shit.

How's that?

I could be the reason Darien is working;
the reason you have food on your table;
the reason you even have a cell phone to call me.

I could be his boss's wife, and he could be headed home right now to tell you that he was fired because he couldn't check his chick.

Stop acting like you're so in love and I'm messing it up. If it was that great, you'd have the open conversation necessary to clear this up. Don't bring me into your kindergarten world. Grow the fuck up and stop acting like an insecure, triflin ass ho!

Additionally, you ever fuckin call me with this shit again, you will have no muthafuckin peace. By the way if you think I'm fuckin playing, I will conveniently forget that you have kids and FUCK your world up. P.S. Ronaldo Morales at at the 78th precinct is my detective. Got it.

(She says sorry.)

No, there is no muthafuckin sorry.

CLICK!

I'M DONE PLAYING NICE.

FUCK DECEITFUL MARRIED MEN WHO NEVER SAY THAT THEY'RE MARRIED!

FUCK MARRIED MEN WHO CAN'T CHECK THEIR CHICKS!

FUCK WIVES AND GIRLFRIENDS WHO CALL RANDOM CHICKS!